“Mom, I Feel Like Cinderella.”
And no, that was not a good thing…. Kristina, our second born was healthy, smart, helpful, and compliant. She was often there to help our son Joey (3 years older than her) when he needed his shoes tied, face washed, or teeth brushed. The problem was – she was only about 7.
Joey’s special needs made it such that he needed a lot of help for us just to “get out the door” and often, she was very willing to help. But this one particular day, I had asked her to do a number of things, right in a row, and not with much chance to comprehend it all. That was when she said, “Mom, I feel like CINDERELLA. Not the pretty one, but the one who had to do all the work.” Ouch.
Sometimes it takes the mirror of reality for us to stop and change our course. That comment did just that for me. I became keenly aware of the fact that she needed to be a kid. I know I didn’t expect her to “take over” my job of caring for our son with special needs, but I was happy for her help, and at that moment I could see I’d lost the ability to see that I was asking too much.
From that moment on, I made some changes. Perhaps the changes I made, will be helpful for you with your children, but also with your extended family, friends, and others in your life.
Dr. Joe and Cindi Ferrini speak nationally for Family Life “Weekend to Remember Get-A-Ways” and have written Unexpected Journey-When Special Needs Change Our Course. They have 3 grown children (one with special needs) and are grandparents. They enjoy staying connected to the outside world via social media and their website! This presentation is from Joe and Cindi’s return appearance for Inclusion Fusion 2012. The title of this presentation is We Are FAMILY!
Special needs care for ONE person in a family affects all the others. In this video, the Ferrini’s share ideas to help all children in the family feel included and “special” in everyday life, and touch briefly on the part extended family can play.
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